Times Like These
by NCISgirl1527
Summary: He had missed her everyday since she left, but it was times like these that he missed her the most because these were the times he needed her the most. Mac reflects on Stella after The Untouchable and realizes she is not quite as far away as she seems.


_**I was watching CSI NY tonight and I just started thinking about what would have happened if Stella had been there instead of Jo. So this is mostly Mac thinking about that a few other things having to do with Stella, Jo, and the world in general. A little random because it just kind of went where it wanted to…I hope you enjoy it.**_

_**Spoilers: The Untouchable (aka the episode that finished 80 minutes ago)**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Mac, Stella, or Jo**_

Mac sighed and ran his fingers through his hair as he looked out over the lights of New York City. To someone else it might seem strange that, with all that had transpired, there was only one thing on his mind, and it might seem even stranger that the one thing was his old partner. However to Mac it made perfect sense because it was times like these that made him miss her most.

After all, it was in times of peril when your partner was most important to you, and it was the hours after the event when your best friend was most important. Stella had been both to him for nearly a decade. He could not count the number of times that they had saved each other's lives or the number of times when something like the events last night had happened and she had been the one to pick him up…or visa versa.

That was not to say that he did not like Jo or that he did not trust her to have his back…because he did on both counts. It was only to say that sometimes he wished he could have Stella back by his side. He knew that was neither a plausible wish nor a fair one, but nonetheless on nights like tonight he wished he could make it come true.

Jo was a good friend and an excellent CSI. She could read his emotions in a way that most people could not, and she respected his space while also making sure he knew she was there for him if he need her. Those were all traits that he admired and respected in her. They were also all traits that Stella had possessed…only Stella had a much different relationship with him. She was a great friend, an excellent CSI, and she could read his emotions faster and better than any person he had ever known…except perhaps Claire. Of course Mac knew that kind of thing came with time, and they had been friends and partners for just shy of twenty years.

Then there was the last attribute, which was the one in which Stella and Jo differed the most greatly. Jo was just pushy enough to let you know that she cared, but Mac was pretty sure that if he asked her to then she would back off. There was no telling Stella to back off. She would stick by him, even after he told her to leave, just to make sure that he was really all right. Maybe that was why he wanted Stella to be with him now…because if she still worked at the lab she would literally be with him now. If Stella still worked here he would not be the last one to leave the lab each night…

It was probably good for him, Mac thought to himself, especially given the probability of him asking someone to talk even if he needed it. The chance was about zero…he knew it and Stella knew it… Maybe that was part of why she always made sure to stick extra close to him after something like this happened…because she knew he needed her even if he would not readily admit it.

It was wrong to compare Jo to Stella…Mac knew that, and he had known it all along, but that had not stopped him from doing it…nor had it stopped him from feeling a slight pang in his chest when he told the 911 operator to connect him to Jo Danville. Again it was not that he held anything against Jo or that he did not want to talk to her. It was that he wanted Stella to be there. He wanted to tell the 911 operator to connect him to Stella Bonasera, but that would be impossible because there was no longer a Detective Stella Bonasera in the New York Crime Lab.

Mac almost smiled as he considered what Stella would say if she could hear his thoughts now. He could almost hear her voice scolding him for comparing her and Jo. She would tell him that wasn't fair. He would respond that he knew it wasn't, but he missed her even more than normal at times like these. Then she would laugh, and tell him that she was in New Orleans not dead, and if he really wanted to talk to her he could just call.

Mac froze wondering why it had taken him that long to realize what he should be doing. Sure he was never good about asking to talk to someone when he need to, but this wasn't just someone. This was Stella, and after everything they had gone through together over the years there really was no room for awkwardness. They might not have seen each other in nearly a year, but they sent emails every day and talked at least once or twice a week. They were still close.

Smiling slightly at the thought, Mac decided that even if Stella could offer him no comfort, just hearing her voice would make him feel at least a little better. So with that thought in mind he reached for his cell phone, which was lying on his desk. Quickly he hit speed dial, and realized that it said something about their relationship that she was still his first speed dial. Slowly he put the phone two his ear and waited.

The phone rang once. Then it rang a second time and a third time. Looking down at his watch Mac realized just how late it was. He should not have called this late. No reasonable person could be expected to answer their phone at this hour. This conversation was just going to have to wait until tomorrow morning. Feeling slightly disappointed, Mac was about to end the call when the fourth ring was interrupted.

"Hello," a familiar voice said from the other end of the line.

A smile crept across Mac's face at the sound.

"Hello," he replied.

_**Okay so there we go…it wasn't perfect and I know that, but I think it turned out pretty nicely. I haven't really written much for CSI NY since Stella left. I love Jo, but Stella will always be my favorite. Anyway, please review. **_


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